Thursday, June 07, 2007

The Argument from Authority for Pirates

And there is a strong case to be made indeed.

The parents of one of my fellow five-year-olds are taking him to Los Angeles today where they will, among other things, visit Disneyland. Now I'm not a fan of Disney Corp., but I've got some pretty fond memories of going to Disneyland as a kid. These fond memories almost all revolve around the ride, "Pirates of the Caribbean." So I told my little friend (I usually call him "Monkey Boy") at dinner last night that he absolutely had to go see the pirates.

And what do pirates say, Monkey Boy?


Good boy.

"But... but my friend at school says that there are underwater bumpercars. I want to do that. Are there underwater bumpercars?"

Maybe. But what's important is that there are pirates. You have to go see the pirates.

"Do they shoot guns?"

No, they mostly swordfight, just like we do - you know, when we're going "aaarghh!"

"Will they get me? Do they come close to you and go 'rrraaawww'?" [tiger claws and grimace]

Oh, not that close. They're mostly swordfighting among themselves. They also shoot cannons at each other from their ships. You get a little wet when cannonballs fall near your boat.

[sotto voce] "Are they real pirates?"

Uh. Well, yeah, they're real pirates. They sing.

"Are there underwater bumpercars?"

Dude, Disneyland is all about the pirates! Go see the pirates!


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